Friday, September 21, 2007

Getting very anxious!

Well today is the 21st of September, in 10 days I will take my 1st injection for my 1st IVF cycle. I am having so many mixed emotions, I have never been so excited about something in my life, and at the same time so nervous. I am so afraid that after all is said and done, no matter how much $$ is spent, how good all of the tests look, and no matter how perfect the embies are, I will still get the dreaded phone call from the Doctor saying, "Danielle I am soo sorry to tell you this but your test shows that you did not conceive this month" My next thought would be, well now what am I supposed to do. $13,000 total paid that we had to take a 2nd mortgage out for and I still dont have the right to be a mother. What did I ever do in my life that was so bad that I dont deserve to be a MOM? I have raised my Lil Sister since she was 8 and me and my DH have full custody of her. Our Mother lives nearby and is doing well now, but had a lot of psycological issues in the past, I just wanted to give Kayla a stable home and that we did. So now the question is when is it my turn? She is now in high school, has always been an honor roll student, very well liked and behaved, so we have done something right. God now I ask of you to please give us our own child to raise and love and make our life more complete. IVF is something I would of never even thought about last year and now am so thankful that is an option.

3 comments:

AwkwardMoments said...

YEH!! Can't wait to follow along!

Jen said...

Welcome to the fun of IVF! I don't think I have any great advice for keeping my sanity but I totally understand your feelings of the unfairness of it all!

And before you know it, the shots will be done and it will be time for retrieval.

Wishing you all the luck in the world!

C said...

Welcome to the blog-world...you will find great support here. Good luck with it all.