Just updating

Ok so our internet has been out a few days and just got fixed today, thank goodness. I feel like I have been out of the loop from my groups and from keeping this site updated. Not much going on but anxiously awaiting tommorrow morning for my first injection. Never did I think I would say I was happy to be giving myself a shot, but if the outcome is positve from the IVF all the shots in the world would be worth it. This weekend has been pretty hectic at work, just got home and winding down, I guess I will update tommorrow.

Meds Came

Well so the meds came yesterday and now it all just seems to real. They are a little overwhelming to look at and I just hope I dont freak at the 1st shot.
8 days until the shots begin, from there I have heard the whole process flys by after that, then the dreaded 2 week wait. Feeling pretty good about the cycle and just anxious to get it done!

Getting very anxious!

Well today is the 21st of September, in 10 days I will take my 1st injection for my 1st IVF cycle. I am having so many mixed emotions, I have never been so excited about something in my life, and at the same time so nervous. I am so afraid that after all is said and done, no matter how much $$ is spent, how good all of the tests look, and no matter how perfect the embies are, I will still get the dreaded phone call from the Doctor saying, "Danielle I am soo sorry to tell you this but your test shows that you did not conceive this month" My next thought would be, well now what am I supposed to do. $13,000 total paid that we had to take a 2nd mortgage out for and I still dont have the right to be a mother. What did I ever do in my life that was so bad that I dont deserve to be a MOM? I have raised my Lil Sister since she was 8 and me and my DH have full custody of her. Our Mother lives nearby and is doing well now, but had a lot of psycological issues in the past, I just wanted to give Kayla a stable home and that we did. So now the question is when is it my turn? She is now in high school, has always been an honor roll student, very well liked and behaved, so we have done something right. God now I ask of you to please give us our own child to raise and love and make our life more complete. IVF is something I would of never even thought about last year and now am so thankful that is an option.